hamburgay:

there’s a me in lame for a reason

(Source: blank, via mynamesnova)

esexist:

*wears the same outfit as yesterday* vintage

(Source: diqqity, via unescapable)

untexting:

i’m that kind of person who between two choices always pick the wrong one

(Source: greetings, via sorry)

urinatings:

*precisely determines where i should take the next bite of my sandwich*

(Source: 750c, via relahvant)

howunpleasant:

friday at school i heard some girl in the hall way scream “FOR THE LAST TIME BITCH IM LESBIAN IM NOT TRYING TO STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND HE SMELLS LIKE KETCHUP ANYWAYS”

(Source: grossmidousuji, via fake-mermaid)

meurve:

I can physically feel my body shutting down and dying slowly